I've been really feeling it in my legs. The race the weekend before this nearly did me in, and for one of the very first times I sat there at the end almost in tears from the sheer exhaustion of it. My coach tells me that I'm in an "over-reached" state of training. I didn't even know what that was, so I had to investigate. Apparently I've been toeing the line between progression, overload, and recovery in a very fatigued state. All sources, including my coach, believe good things will be coming out of these hard, tired races, but in the meantime, the constant state of fatigue is getting to me. I feel like I can't workout like I would like to. I'm being forced to take the weeks very easy in between race weekends just to prepare for the next. When I do race, I still feel tired, and then my weekly TSS shoots right up again. I've also been dealing with stress from The Big Move, which happened just earlier this week.

This weekend is my brief getaway from it all. A girl's weekend to relax... and suffer.

On Preparedness...

Unfortunately, Kirsten and I both seemed to forget just how much colder Arkansas can feel when compared to Oklahoma, especially when you're down in the valleys of those great mountains. Neither of us brought enough clothing. Come race morning, the start was a brutal 30-something degrees. I had just brought my tri-kit, and happened to have a spare long sleeve race jersey shoved inside my gear bag, which I opted to wear at the race start, knowing that I would desperately need that extra warmth on the bike leg. I had not remembered to bring any other leg warmers, knee warmers, baselayers, or tights, and for the not the first time I found myself wondering why I never thought to buy a spare tub of embrocation cream to keep with my gear for emergencies like this.

I warmed up the best I could. It was difficult. Because of the cold my paces were starting off very slowly, and I could tell during my strides that I was going to be fighting off that seemingly ever-present fatigue for this race. As I finished my warmup I lined up amongst the tight group of racers, all bracing together against the weather, and listened to the pre-race instructions. Then to my dismay, we were directed to scooch back and allow the 1-mi fun runners their moment to shine. Wut? In this cold?! Sigh. So we waited, standing there, bouncing on our feet, trying desperately not to let our muscles get cold again as the all fun-runners ran their course and crossed the finish line.

Don't let the sun fool you. That's me, faking a smile, and freezing.

20 minutes later, we are allowed to start. The race was in waves, so the men took off first. A couple minutes later, the women and relayers lined up. I spotted Erin, the Olympian whom I had raced against one short week prior, as well as a few other familiar faces, such as the race director's lovely wife. We greeted and wished each other well, and then we were off!

The Race

I spy Erin!

She sports a very convincing face of determination...

Maybe it was the cold. Maybe it was still the fatigue. I'm not 100% sure... it was probably both. But I started out s l o w. Holding even a 7:30 min/mi was a challenge. Fortunately, as things began thinning out, I set my sights on an Arkansas chic with brightly colored animal print leggings directly ahead of me, and used her to set my pace. It worked. As she picked it up towards the end I managed to make up for some lost time by negative splitting the pace down into the low 7:00s, high 6:00 range. However, I was still worried. The field was much deeper here than at Okarche, and my worse-than-normal run pace had set me back quite a bit. I was going to have to really focus on the bike if I wanted to get some time back.

I don't care how dorky I look in this skull cap

I went out hard, noting that the direction of the headwind felt like it was on this outward bound leg. I managed to catch and pass animal print chickie fairly quickly. Then it was just a matter of putting my head down and powering through. Like Okarche, I found myself again using my power meter to my advantage. This time it was definitely more of a struggle to stay on target, but with perseverance I managed to stay in my sweet spot , although on average I was a few watts shy of what I put out at Okarche. No matter. I seemed to still be making great gains in this race, and at the turnaround I noted how close I was to catching up on the lead. I set about churning out that negative split again, successfully (2 for 2, y'all!), and by the very end of the bike leg had managed to catch every female on the course save for Erin, whose significantly faster run had set her out on the course 5.5 minutes ahead of me.

I've really got to work on that running start. It's not like 'cross at all!

The second run absolutely fucking brutal. Hands down the hardest run leg I've ever done. By this point, there was no question that the perpetual state of fatigue had caught up with me. It was absolutely excruciating to even hold a 7:40 pace, and I saw my pace drop over and over and over into the 8:00 min/mi range. 3 or 4 of the race leaders I had caught and passed on the bike just flew by me. I was disheartened, knowing in my mind I had just been put back into 5th place. At the halfway turnaround I rallied, realizing that the closest women to me were just far enough back that I might hold them off... but I would have to really try! The rest of the way back, the only thought running through my mind was "Don't think! Don't think!" and I tried my best not to. I put my head down and tried to do what I had done so many times in training, finishing strong on tired, fatigued legs, hoping against hope that they wouldn't listen to my brain telling them "No!" and would just go... dropping that pace down into the sub-7:00 range.

The line neared, and then BOOM! Finally! I had crossed. I immediately stopped and hobbled over to a table to bend over it and stop myself from hurling. I hurt so badly. I didn't even notice the race volunteer peeling the timing chip off my ankle. At least I managed 5th in this field, I thought, and that would be something. My spirits were bouyed by the face that I knew I had a killer bike time, too, and might be in contention for best bike split, depending upon how Erin did.

Post-Race

Post-race I checked the results, and was happier than I could have imagined to learn that I hadn't got 5th, I had gotten 4th overall and 1st in my AG! Apparently, one of the females who had passed me on that second run was a relayer, not a duathlete. On top of it, I did have the best bike split! I beat the Olympian! Granted, it wasn't by much, but it made me thrilled beyond reason to have done so. There's hope in me yet...

Plus I got some really sweet swag.

If pigs could fly...

As for Kirsten, since she's been nursing a hamstring injury, she opted to do the TT instead of the duathlon (better safe than sorry!). Of course, she blew my TT out of the water and I believe set a course record. I woulda snapped a photo of her coming in, but girl was too fast!

Eucha Classic

The weekend after Iron Pig I found myself back in Eucha, Oklahoma, for the annual Eucha Classic. Last year this race was the state championship and I managed to snag my first ever State Champ jersey for the Cat 3 women. This year, I'm not sure what happened, but it was not designated as the championship race, even though no other race has been deemed as such. In addition, the course has changed to be less confusing, but longer, and the Women's 123 race was extended an extra 20 miles! Nonetheless, this race was hands-down my favorite course in all of Oklahoma, and I was deeply looking forward to returning.

The Race

Sadly, it seemed not a lot of other women were as excited about this race as I was! Although the course start is extremely close to Fayetteville (in fact, I still had to drive 3 hours to get here; Arkansas girls would have only had to have driven 1), no Arkansas girls showed up, and only a smattering of the Okie 123 women did.

And so it was that I found myself on a 2 person ride for 50 something miles. 

Helene started the race out fairly hard, and she managed to peel away about mile 3 or 4. Kirsten held back for me, but I was having trouble pushing so hard so early in the race, and I eventually had to let Kirsten go to catch back up with Helene. Shay was chasing them hard, and as we rounded a corner I managed to lose track of her wheel. From the NWA race, I knew how strong she could push, and she was desperately chasing my two teammates to try to catch back on. I glanced down at my power, realizing that I was solidly at threshold and had been for 20 minutes now. Well, I thought, technically you should be able to hold this for an hour... So I buckled in and kept pushing hard.

This was the first weekend I actually felt rested enough to be in okay form. Only days before I had realized that for the first time I was no longer feeling a constant state of fatigue. On the other hand, I realized that I had felt a constant state of fatigue for about a month! I was thrilled to finally start feeling normal again. So with that in mind, I knew I could keep pushing. That thought gave me hope that maybe I could catch Shay this time...

Just before the Big Climb, I did! I managed to grab back on to Shay's wheel and I planted myself firmly there. I followed her up the climb, then followed her up some other stretches of road until finally I knew Kirsten and Helene were gone. Then, I decided, I could work with Shay. After all, it was gonna be the two of us for the rest of the 62 mile course. We were heading south into some strong headwinds, and I did not relish the thought of tackling this course solo! To her credit, Shay never even said anything, knowing what was up.

For the remainder of the race, we satisfied ourselves with pushing and pulling, yo-yo-ing with one of the men's fields for what seemed like a good 40 miles, using them to motivate us to get the damn race over with! We had good conversation. I really had never gotten the chance to ever chat with Shay before, and I appreciated getting to know her a little better. She's a former Olympian, now enjoying cycling as a form of retirement. I'm starting to see where her strength comes from...

After what seemed an almost interminable length of time, we finally turned right onto what we both knew was the last stretch of road leading up to the finish. The day wasn't hot, exactly, but it was a long course and there was no neutral feed zone. We had both been out of water for some time... the thought of crossing that line just to get a sip was a powerful motivator!

As we made the final descents, I noted happily that I seemed to be descending more comfortably than Shay was. The sheer terror of those descents I had felt last year was gone! All that time going up and down Mt. Scott and the hills in Talimena were paying off (thank you's to Kirsten and Dan). While I was by no means great, or even good, I think that finally, I was becoming a non-hazard to myself and to those around me. Yay for the positives!

The final descent into the valley marked the final 5 miles of the race. 

At this point, it seemed like Shay was finally tiring. She standing more, grinding it out more on the climbs. More than once I contemplated trying to break away here and to finish solo. 

But I hesitated.

Shay was riding strong. This was only my second real race with her, and I had no idea if I could do it, or if she would track me back down like an animal.

Looking back, I literally had nothing to lose and I should have tried. I regret that decision. But nonetheless, I held off, staying on her wheel, not letting her go but not moving past her either. I waited... there was the 5k sign (so cruel!)... the 1k... then over the rise the 200 m!

I saw the sign and pushed out ahead of it, hoping to get her to attack her and carry me to the line. It worked, and she attacked back! I dropped back on her wheel and spun like mad. Suddenly I realized I was gaining on her and was forced left of her. There I found myself neck and neck with her, the line approaching quickly. I thought for a brief moment that this would be a photo finish. Then at the last possible second Shay managed an extra oomph! in her drive and finished just ahead of me. I actually heard her exclaim "yes!"

At the moment I wasn't unhappy. Anyone who knows me knows I have zero sprinting ability, so the fact that I even managed to worry somebody in a sprint made me exceedingly giddy. And it was so close! Alas. 

Next time, I will have to trust myself more. Next time, hopefully it will be different.